The Internet Confessional

Everyone has a guilty pleasure, right?

Something they don’t necessarily admit to a stranger as the first thing to tell them, but something that their best friend will know?

I have more than a few.  I knit and I’m almost 40, and I used to own a cat–stupid stereotype.  I like to cook, love board games, and have an unhealthy obsession with movies and tv.

Certain shows, no matter how many times you’ve seen them, you always stop at, right?  Another broadcast of Bring It On, or Legally Blonde, or Firefly/Serenity.  The private DVD stash of Girls Just Want To Have Fun, Zorro: The Gay Blade, and Clueless.    Things you hide in the back of the drawer but can quote word for word?

The latest one for me is Burlesque.  I never saw it in the theaters, but found it on Encore one night when channel surfing.

I think I’ve seen it 30 times since. 

I can’t help it.  I admit it.  I love Cher.  I love Christina Aguilera’s music, and as an actress she grows on you.  I adore Stanley Tucci.  McSteamy makes an appearance.  And Cam Gigandet?  Yummy.  I love the bawdy dance numbers.  I love the corny lyrics.  I love the predictable plot.  I just adore the movie.

I have to go now.  They’re talking about “air rights” again….

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Delayed Grief and Farewell My Friend

Several years ago, a friend of mine had a headache.  Who knew that it was the beginning of the end.

Over the years, she and I developed a friendship.  A single mom who was struggling with the idea of ending her marriage, she knew that the best thing for her two daughters was to part from the father, as he was a bit too fond of his vices, and try to make a go of it on her own.  She was just a few years older than I, and throughout the phenomenon known as ‘nap time’ during the GCN Saturday shows I found out she used to live around the corner from my Aunt and Uncle, and babysat my two younger cousins.  We were not exceptionally close–we didn’t go to the movies or hang out outside of church.  But I did consider her a friend.  And a true soul at that.

She was a beautiful woman, with two beautiful daughters.  She raised her daughters in the church, and the three of them had an organic and true love for God.  She had a younger brother who was a surrogate father to them, for they loved their Uncle.

Then there came a day that she was having a headache.  Her father, after two days, forced her to go to the hospital.  No simple migraine, it turns out that she actually had MDS–myelodysplastic syndrome.  Once known as preleukemia, it is a blood disorder.  Most commonly found in people who have had chemotherapy for other conditions, it sometimes hits people for no reason at all.  That was my friend.

For the next year and a half, we watched her sail through blood transfusions, treatments, etc.  Her daughters were amazing.  Her test results came back with fantastic results.  Then there was the day that her results were not so fantastic.  She had a setback.  And then she had another.  And then it went from just a setback to full-blown leukemia.

Then came chemo.  Again, Continue reading