Television

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The things we do for strangers

Tonight was the last night I had Wicked duty this week.  I came home (after being at the theater for the last eleven hours) and had a ton of emails.  One of them was a comment to this post asking where one of the receptions occurred.  I have no idea.  The show was on almost eight weeks ago, and it didn’t make a great impression on me at the time.

Instead of just ignoring the comment, what do I do?  I sit at the computer and try to research the info.  I know the name of the bride (maiden and married, to boot).  I know how much she and her now-husband paid in real estate taxes last year.  I know that there are a LOT of people that either love or hate the show.  But I cannot find a show recap that has detail in any location. And it doesn’t look like TLC will be rebroadcasting that particular episode of Four Weddings any time in the near future.

Before I knew it, over TWO HOURS had passed.  I have to call it quits.  I am exhausted and I have to get ready for my shower and bed.

So Alison, my dear, I’m sorry.  I don’t know.  It was a great restaurant, with an awesome view, but I haven’t got the foggiest idea where the reception was held.

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When the experience doesn’t live up to the hype

I love Lost.  Sure, it has some bad memories from the first seasons with he-who-is-gone, but the show itself I love.  This season, some friends and I gather to watch it every Tuesday night.  Last week we were staring at the teaser for this week’s episode in slow-mo trying to see what was going on.  “So big we can’t show you a preview” was the general theme.

Well, the show was good, but not that good.

I mean who doesn’t love Sayid.  And who wouldn’t like a show centered around him.  Confused as all get out when his brother is married to Nadia, the love of his life.  Can’t believe he turned rogue on the temple.

But all in all?  A bit disappointing.

Now I know that Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse have had the entire season plotted out and have vowed to answer some of the questions, but don’t you think that they shouldn’t be creating questions at this point?
Still, it’s one of the best hours on TV right now, so I enjoy it.  Plus who doesn’t like getting together with friends once a week??? 🙂
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Sheldon Cooper is my hero

Sunday night is the night where the girls hang out.  We watch tv or movies or play games, and two of the three of us knit or crochet to pass the time while watching television.  Tonight there is no new episode of Grey’s Anatomy or Private Practice, so we decided to catch up one of the girls with the Big Bang Theory.  She is through the first season, and we’re now into season two.

More than anything else, I love Sheldon Cooper.  There are just things he says to be a part of the conversation that crack me up.  His complete and total lack of comprehension of social norms is a hoot, and then there is the new go-to word for fun times.

BAZINGA!

Going back to season two now.  Have a great night!

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Proof that Industry Standards need to change

Project Runway is one of my favorite reality television shows.  Yes, it’s starting to cycle.  Yes, it’s all starting to run together.  Yes, it’s formulaic.  But it’s still impressive to see the amazing talent (and incredible delusion) that the contestants have.  The new follow-up show, Models of the Runway, has been fun as well.  It’s been interesting to see the girls that never talked before and how they are going through the competition.

Last season there was a model that was visited by her son.  I remember thinking that there was no way on earth that those hips had borne a child.  This woman–a statuesque 5’10”, beautiful complexion, skeleton with skin–was just so stinkin’ skinny, I could not imagine her pregnant.  The picture I have in my head is of a woman toppling over because the weight of the pumpkin sitting on her front was pulling her over.

That being said, this past month was New York Fashion Week.  Models galore with the opportunity to walk the catwalk for genius designers, some working as many as three shows a day.  One of the more famous models recently is the lovely 21-year-old Coco Rocha.  At 120 pounds, she is, in my opinion, underweight for her 5’10” frame.  Yet the people in New York have been denying her work because her size 4 frame is considered too fat for fashion.

The average American woman is at least a size 12.  The average runway model has gained weight and moved to a size zero from a size double zero.  What about this is normal?  What happened to the Christie Brinkley’s and the Cindy Crawfords of old, the women with curves?  What happened to HEALTHY looking women?  Did the Kate Moss era change the perspective of every human?  Do people really think that skeletal hipbones are healthy and normal?

I’m not advocating a nation of obese people.  I’m not saying we all need to have Krispy Kreme for three meals every day.  I am just asking what the perception of normal is in an industry that is supposed to appeal to the common woman.

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In defense of the worst, part one

I recently saw a listing of the worst TV shows released in the past decade. Some of them, like According to Jim and Kath and Kim, rightfully belong in the top five (I still can’t believe that According to Jim was on the air for several seasons!  Maybe these two should be a lesson to not name the sitcom after the main character?).

I took issue with one of the ‘winners’ in particular: Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.  Granted, it wasn’t Aaron Sorkin’s brightest shining moment.  And yes, it was obvious from the character of Harriet Hayes that he was bitter about his then-recent breakup to noted Christian Kristin Chenoweth.  But there were some parts of the show that were outstandingly brilliant, and I think it deserves to be recognized as such.  It came on the air the same time that 30 Rock debuted, and as an hour-long drama instead of a half hour sitcom it was the runner up in the on-air battle.  Yanked before it’s episodes finished running, the set was destroyed before the final episodes aired. Thanks to DVDs, however, I am able to watch it in its entirety about twice a year.

Admittedly, I felt like it was overkill with the ‘you’re going to hell and I’m not just because I was baptized and you are a heathen’.  But correct me if I’m wrong, isn’t premarital sex, monogomy, and blasphemy outlawed by the Bible as well?  In which case, said character would be going to hell also, correct?

That aside, however, it was a remarkable use of an amazing cast.  Continue reading →

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Big Bang Theory Quotes Part 2

Okay, this show continues to crack me up. I managed to catch one today that I hadn’t seen during the season, and here are some great lines.  From “The Cushion Saturation”:

Leonard: You know what baffles me, Sheldon?
Sheldon: Based on your academic record, any number of things I would imagine.

Leonard: Are you done?
Sheldon: No. (pause) Despite what the name would suggest, the sivid cat is not a true cat. (pauses again) Now I’m done.

Wolowitz: One way to look at this is that I am getting new equipment and you’re not, and that’s unfair; but a better way to look at it is that I’m getting sex and you’re not and that’s delightful!

Sheldon: Hello Penny
Penny: Hello Sheldon
Sheldon: You’re in my spot.

Penny (regarding Sheldon): You know I love him, but he is one serious whackadoodle.

Penny: No, I’m from Nebraska. When we shoot things it’s because we want to eat them or make them leave our boyfriends alone.

Leonard: We?  No, no, no.  You had your chance to be a ‘we’ for a year and a half now.  You’re on your own.

Wolowitz as phone rings: Oooh! It looks like I’m going to have sex tonight!
Penny in an aside to Leonard: His right hand is calling?

Leslie Winkle, post coitus: You’re improving!
Wolowitz: Thank you! It helps when I get to practice with a real woman.

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Big Bang Theory Quotes Part 1

It may be dweeby, but this show cracks me up.  And some nights, like tonight, there are lines that have me rolling over I’m laughing so hard.  So I’ve decided to start a running list of quotes from Big Bang Theory.  From the May 4 episode titled “The Classified Materials Turbulence”

Sheldon: For what it’s worth, my mother says that when we deceive for personal gain we make Jesus cry.

Wolowitz (with amazement): You don’t know what thing thing is?
Stuart/Comic Guy (looking befuddled): No
Wolowitz: Good. Get out!

Koothrappali: Oh get over yourself. It’s a high tech toilet.

Leonard: It must be hell inside your head.
Sheldon: At times.

Wolowitz: We gotta find a way using nothing but this to reinforce this so the waste material avoids the spinning turbine.
Koothrappali: You mean so it doesn’t hit the fan?

Sheldon: You know, I have to say I thought the toilet humor would get less funny with repetition.  Apparently there is no law of diminishing comedic returns with space poop.

Koothrappali:  Of course you feel terrible, you completely screwed up your karma dude!
Sheldon: You don’t really believe in that superstition, do you?
Raj: It’s not superstition, it’s practically Newtonian.  For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.  Leonard pretends to be a friend and acts like a two-faced bitch, therefore he is reborn as a banana slug.  It’s actually a very elegant system.  You know, what goes around comes around.
(Later, after Leonard delays a coffee run to knock on Penny’s door to ask how her date went and apologize for giving bad advice and is rebuffed) Raj: You really want to clean up your karma, go get my freakin’ latte.

Wolowitz: Sheldon, I know what I am doing.
Sheldon: If you knew what you were doing there wouldn’t be a space toilet where my coffee table should be.

Sheldon: That was a joke.  It’s funny, because it’s true.

Penny: What the hell was THAT?
Wolowitz: Meatloaf.
Leonard: What was it doing on the ceiling?!
Wolowitz: That’s classified.

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I have a bone to pick with Saturday Night Live

I have watched Saturday Night Live since I was in about 7th or 8th grade.  I have seen it through many cast members, highs, lows, stupid pranks, and inspired sketches.  I remember when Hans and Franz and the Church Lady made the daily vernacular in high school, I thought the cheerleader skit by Will Farrell and Cheri Oteri was like grating fingernails on a blackboard, and was so thankful to see Rachael Dratch leave.  I miss classic 80s performers like Dana Carvey and Victoria Jackson, and mourn the loss of the brilliant talents of Phil Hartman and Chris Farley, even if he wasn’t my particular brand of humor.  I think that Dennis Miller and Kevin Nealon did a great job hosting the news, no matter what Lorne Michaels thinks, and I think that Seth Myers should host the news without guests like Snagglepuss and Comic Strip Cathy.  I think that the show needs to not have an annual contract with Alec Baldwin or Christopher Walken, and I truly believe that Gilda Radner was singularly the best talent ever to appear on the show.

That being said, I do still watch the show.  I think that there are several entertaining minutes that can be found, thus the reason for watching via Tivo so I can fast forward through stuff that is running too long.   But there is a new recurring theme that is driving me insane.

I cannot STAND the MacGruber sketches.  It was funny–at first.  It was a spoof on something that I loved as a kid.  After all, who didn’t love a show where an ordinary guy could make a car run on an egg and a rubber band.  But the short enjoyment of the sketch was when they first started back in January of 2007.  It has been over two years!  Get a new gig already!  And for Pete’s sake why do you have an entire miniseries within the episode.  It’s all about fast forwarding, now, baby!  I think the two main characters are very talented, but the theme music alone has me reaching for the remote.

It’s not like there is anything that is much better as a substitute.  We have the anal version of breathe right strips, the edible diaper commercials, the Activa/Jamie Lee Curtis spoofs . . . see a recurring theme here?  This isn’t exactly a welcome alternative to the MacGruber shorts,  but at least they don’t have the awful theme music.

So is the show just in a rut? Does it need fresh writers? Or does America really need to have explosions and bowel movements for entertainment?

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Doctor Grover, at your service!

dr-groverI have to say when I saw this photo I was absolutely thrilled.  Then I found out he was going to be on Scrubs.  Now I would normally watch Scrubs anyway, but this just made me want to watch even more.  It was a short scene, didn’t last more than 45 seconds or so, but he even managed to get in the “Near . . . . . . . . Faaaarrrrrr!” that instantly brought back images from the original Sesame Street TV show.

Here’s to the brilliance that is, was, and forever shall be Jim Henson.  What a wonderful way to continue these characters, and such a great use of an old favorite!

(Now if they had only had Super Grover crash through the door in order to save the day, or Waiter Grover deliver Kelso his muffin . . . .)

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When Commercial Advertising Actually Works

As a devoted TiVo owner, I freely admit that I fast forward through 98% of all commercials that air on my television set–a cardinal sin for someone who used to work for a major advertising agency. However, while watching the BCS Championship Game this evening, I had to watch the commercials and all. I am so tired of Verizon phones, the Hardee’s Little Thickburger, Financial advisors, Olive Garden and Kevin James’s new movie, but there was one commercial that cracked me up.

It was for FedEx, the sponsor for the football game. It is a pretty generic commercial, and the last five seconds had me laughing out loud. It opens in an office where people are doing anything to keep warm–wastebasket fires, insular ware, etc. All due to Nordic Tuesdays. A coworker asks if the theme is just because it is fun (where everyone of course is miserable) or if it is because they need to save money. Enter the FedEx delivery man, who talks about how they can save money with the business plan and blah blah blah blah. Who cares. I tuned it out. After Mr. Announcer Man gave his spiel, it cuts to a man sitting against the bathroom wall next to the sinks working on a laptop. The background noise stops, and he reaches overhead and smacks the auto hand dryer that is just above his head. Instantly returns to typing without missing a step. Hilarious.

I guess you really had to see it, but trust me, it was funny.

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As much as I love Joshua is as much as I am annoyed by Mary

And that’s a lot.

I am absolutely immersed in So You Think You Can Dance.  I have watched since Season 2, and it’s the water-cooler show for the girls here on the second floor at the office.

I love Mia Michaels and her ‘earthy’ style of choreography, I love the addition of Tabitha and Napoleon this year and their ‘lyrical hip-hop’ routines, I love that Doriana Sanchez thinks that disco and the hustle (which are admittedly difficult when done properly) deserve their proper place among the foxtrot and contemporary despite how cheesy they look.  I think that Tyce is hit or miss, I that Nigel is very well versed, and I think that Mary is extremely talented and full of great advice but needs to shut her yap on occasion and stop with the screaming.  It drives me nuts.  Be complimentary.  Have a shtick.  Just don’t do it at twelve decibles.

That being said, ohmigoshhowawesomewerejoshuaandkateelastnight?????  Continue reading →

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Let the summer couch potato season begin!

How much do I look forward to sitting in my chair on Wednesday and Thursday nights now?  I came home from work around 11 with a stomach bug, and worked until around 5.  I passed out, took meds, and then realized that it was Wednesday.  The first night of So You Think You Can Dance‘s actual competition.

Okay, again, I don’t lead much of a life.  When this is the most exciting thing that has happened to me this week then I really need to reevaluate.

But hey!  SYTYCD! I don’t watch American Idol or Dancing with the Stars, I think they’re both boring.  But this?  This, I can get into.  So sit back, find your local Fox affiliate, and enjoy the ride!

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Technical Malfunction

So as I have said before, I am a TV whore. Vulgar, but oh-so-true. When cable or TiVo don’t work then it’s a bad thing around here.

But what cracks me up is when it tricks me out. I came home from work tonight and did the usual routine–cleaned up the kitchen a bit, took out recycling, took a shower, made dinner, etc. Then I rewound the TiVo (gotta love that 30 minute delay) to catch Jeopardy. Made sure the channel wasn’t frozen on the digital cable, something that is common in this weather, and settled down to enjoy the show. At 8pm on the clock, the TiVo started recording this month’s guilty pleasure–So You Think You Can Dance. After dinner and cleaning up I settled in to watch the show.

LIES! ALL LIES!!

The TiVo thought it had switched channels and was recording, but the weather conditions are worsening and therefore the cable box only registered two of the first three digits to change the channel. As there is no channel 01, I ended up getting 40 minutes of Wife Swap. Not only did I get 40 minutes of the atrocity I also had the blue kyron info bar at the bottom of the screen. On Wife Swap! I’m sorry, but this ranks right up there with American Idol, that annoying nanny lady, and Something About Jim as one of the worst shows on TV.

Give me the talented, deluded, fit, and delusional auditions over on Fox, please. I want my 20 minutes back.

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Now what do we do?

So four years ago there was this new show on TV.  It came on Sunday nights and it was total soap-opera material, but it was still a good show.  And the lead guy was darn good looking.  And it had some sassy supporting women in it as well.  So what if the main character was whiny and neurotic.  Gray’s Anatomy was still a good show.  B was over one night and got caught in it as well, and before I knew it every Sunday night we were making plans for dinner and to watch GA.  Double bonus for me, as I got to cook–something I don’t do that often for myself as it’s a bit boring to have leftovers for an entire week.

Well then, drat it, the people at ABC had to go mess things up.  They moved the show to a Thursday night slot.  Well B works on Thursday nights.  So Tivo, that blessed invention, once again saves the day and we still watch on Sundays.  Our party grew to three as she started seeing her high school sweetheart again, who is now her husband.  When he’s in town he joins in.  (And annoys us with ‘What happened to Burke?’ every ten minutes!) Continue reading →

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Games People Play

I have always been a game freak.  Board games, card games, you name it.  Late nights spent at my Nana and Papa’s house as a kid playing Scrabble and Triominoes in the kitchen so as not to wake Papa from his evening ‘nap’.  Growing up going to the beach where we had dinner at four in the afternoon so that we could play Rook for the entire evening.  Dad saying when I was seven that it was wrong that the parent actually had to cheat to win at Monopoly against me.  To this day still playing cards with family whenever we can, and younger brother and I can be reduced to hysterical tears of laughter over a game of Slapjack.  We have also drawn legions of stares while playing a spirited game of double-deck Spit while riding in the dining car across South Korea.  Mother’s day this year was spent as mom desired–playing dominoes with me, her, and nana.  Birthday this year was celebrated at a Cici’s pizza teaching a ten year old, seven year old, and their mother how to play Othello.

And a sympathetic loser, I am not.

I play to win, and make no bones about it.  Don’t even care if it’s a seven year old.   They need to learn disappointment.

So how excited am I that the game Password has returned to TV?  I remember watching it with my nana after the Price is Right as a kid and she even had the old board game version that we would also play at the beach.  This has the potential to be very bad, as I already should the answer whenever Jeopardy is on, and dude!  Neil Patrick Harris was on tonight!  What’s not to love??!!??!!